How are you doing? I hope you are still holding up well. I know life is tough but so it is 5 years later. I know you are still trying to figure out your strengths and your limitations. That is fine. You really need to take your time on that. I know that sometimes you are too clueless that you just want to forget everything and live - on. I just want to remind you of the realizations that I have now in the future and hopefully be able to guide you.
My beloved, please value work and work smart. Believe me on this one. You will fail in almost all aspects of this topic. You will procrastinate a lot and you will, most of the time, take things for granted. I wish you will realize earlier that you have great potentials that you need to unfold and embrace. Stop comparing yourself to others. You may fail in some things but believe me, you are amazing on all other stuff. Focus on improving yourself and develop a habit that will lead you to success. Stop giving excuses and start working out your plans. It’s never too late, never too late. Make your experiences your license to slay the future and what's ahead.
Value relationship. You don't really have to gain thousands of friends on Facebook nor Instagram. You don't need to impress anyone either. Just be kind to everybody and be wise in choosing your set of friends. Make sure to get in touch with them and make sure to be the friend that you want for yourself. You will meet a lot of them. You will meet good ones. The kind of friends who are always there to support you regardless of the situation. They will stick around regardless the distance, without judgment and without question. Cherish them, they will be vital for your success, emotional health and in your life in general.
Love and be loved. You will meet assholes. Plenty of them. I guess that is because you will be very anxious about getting one so you will not be tagged as the ugly duckling. Accept the fact that you are born different with unique talents and characteristics. Turn every heartbreaks and frustrations into lifelong lessons and be sure to learn from it. You are used to learning things the hard way and I want you to realize as early as now, that chasing after people who don't want to stay is like running on a treadmill for 5 hours; it's impossible and tiring. It will be rough but remember that no matter how promising the relationship is, accept the reality that some people you meet in life are in your timeline to prepare you for the one that will be with you forever. Be thankful for the experiences and the learnings both the good and bad. Those will make you wiser and tougher. Strive to always be a positive impact on someone's life so you will leave a memorable mark in their heart.
Above all, treasure your family. I can never stress this enough. You have failed them and they are still there for you no matter what. Make up for the times you missed and try to be present. Strive harder for your family and as the band goes, "Make your Mama Proud - MYMP"
Lastly, Just live. Live relentlessly with hopes and a great attitude towards people and yourself. Worry about being better. Drop your insecurities, they won't matter in the future. Learn to harness your skills in all areas and just enjoy life.
Live, Love and be loved. Let go of the past and be hopeful for the future. You have your future to conquer.
Love,
Your 20-ish self <3
